[irishman82]

Dear Kissingfish,

You are not being harsh at all IMO, I've done wrong and I deserve wrong to go with me. I am going to read the article you posted and will post more later about it.

I just really don't know what to say, some of the things that you said opened my eyes, some of them are out of my control.

I don't know where I'm at, just hoping to die sometime soon and be out of this misery, all fears I had in my life about a relationship are becoming true. When I think of it, it eats me inside. All my life it's been like that, perhaps you are right and I should let her go, though I am not holding her, she is with me by her choice...

Her parents are great people and didn't mean to sound negative about the way they helped us, I was just always raised in a way like worry about tomorrow and make money for your family... I don't know if money was and is a priority like you say, it does cause a lot of anxiety in me for fear of loosing my job etc... what happens then? not only there would be no income I feel like I would get blamed for it.