[RestoreTheRiver]

Mr. Dude:

Your respect for, and devotion to, your parents is commendable. If you are living at home, as is likely, at the age of 17, then going to the church your father chooses is an appropriate action of respect and obedience.

At the same time, legalism is more than unfortunate. It is a deadly poison. You've begun to recognize that; and your friend is helping you to see more and more of that reality.

As an emerging adult, with a call to the ministry, you should have the respect of your parents in return. Therefore, it should be possible to discuss your concerns about this church, and your desire to explore other options. You could offer scriptural support for your concerns, and point out that, as a future pastor, it would be good for you to experience other perspectives.

If your parent's are deeply committed to this church, this discussion may be difficult, to say the least. Bathe it in prayer first, and see how the Lord leads you. You may be called to bring fresh Light on these concerns to your own parents.

As a pastor-in-training, use everything that happens to you as a part of your development. Why does this church teach as it does? What good are they trying to achieve and perserve? Where does this good intention go wrong? What does scripture say? Your tradition doesn't speak of tradition. But, you do recognize the godly example of those who have gone before us. What do the great teachers you respect, past and present, have to say about legalism? What are the pastoral implications? In short, think and pray through the whole experience theologically. Let it all be part of your learning and discipling process.

If it is not possible to seek another church at this time, broaden your perspective with good friendship, fellowship, and study.

To quote an old teacher of mine, I believe "God is stirring your nest."

Michael